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Next up is Brittany Carney.
People began referencing me in relation to preschool material.
While thatdidinform a chapter of my life, it was a short chapter.
Im most proud of bits Ive managed on the Founding Fathers.
I performed inFood Wars,some play based onStar Warsexcept about, like, groceries.
I was a shy kid, far from a class clown.
I got cast as the character based on Darth Vader and wore a big mask.
When my name was announced at curtain call, Mr. Hendrix cheered loudly and gave me a big thumbs-up.
I dont know where he is now.
Shes a toxic rebel chef who braises beef in Chicago.
Nah, maybe shes an apprentice sushi chef in a cutthroat program.
They call her Obama.
I havent figured out the right riff to contextualize it, exactly, but that wont stop me.
Tell us everything about your worst show ever.Gosh, theres plenty.
The first time I headlined was at a tropical-themed restaurant in suburban Maryland.
An ambush on families enjoying their meal.
My face was on the flyer tacked to the door.
My dads cousin surprise-appeared from Philadelphia, just to see me bomb for 25 minutes.
I know him from D.C. comedy days.
The problem is that I do know him personally.
When it comes to your comedy opinions about material, performing, audience, the industry, etc.
It looks stiff, like youre protecting yourself from getting impaled.
But hes not coming for you.
I am, though, with a dang wrench.
Im not saying my stage presence is good; maybe its even messed the hell up.
But I shout from the summit: Release your elbow.
Make vulnerable your chest and core!
Whats an embarrassingly earnest goal you have?I want to take my mom to an awards show.
Maybe thats still the best advice.
(I was not.)
Obviously let the audience into your head; thats the whole point.Theylldecide if something works.
