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Next up isDevon Walker.
Imagine having a good day then you gotta go sleep underground?
I have a friend named Enzo my character would be named after him.
Theyd all make custom T-shirts with my catchphrase I wouldnt do that if I were you on it.
I dont know why I gave myself such a corny show to be part of, damn.
I could have picked anything.
If any networks are reading this, I can do better, I promise.
Id just sort of vibe up there onstage for a while while I Couldnt Love You More plays.
Maybe I wouldnt even do any jokes.
Id just have a bunch of 50-something-year-olds quietly grooving in their linen pants.
Tell us everything about your worst show ever.I did a show at this secret weed club.
People were smoking weed in every imaginable way.
They literally had a blunt-rolling contest before the show started.
I went up, and everything I said was bombing.
Im not even getting chuckles.
I wanted to be mad, but she was thinking the same thing as me.
I finished my set to mostly silence, then left as soon as I got offstage.
Didnt say bye to anyone.
In the elevator down, a man patted me on the shoulder and said, Youll get there someday.
I hope hes right.
If anything, theres a ton of people in comedy who should quit.
Theres too many of us.
Theres a pilot shortage right now I think the airlines should start recruiting at open mics.
It would make the world a better place.
But I WILL tell you some people who I do know personally that I think should have more success.
Shout-out to my guyConner McNutt.
One of the funniest people Ive ever known, onstage and off.
They deserve it all.
AndGrace Kuhlenschmidt shes one of the only people online that really makes me laugh.
When it comes to your comedy opinions about material, performing, audience, the industry, etc.
what hill will you die on?Ill never forgive Instagram for incentivizing Reels.
Now I gotta watch my peers pump out low-res videos with captions.
I get why people have to do it, but I absolutely hate it.
Whats an embarrassingly earnest goal you have?I want to be Michelle Obamas second husband.
I have a hard enough time remembering the important stuff.
