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Ghosts and forest spirits warn him of his doom and beseech him to turn around.
They tell him the enemy is someone he knows.
But despite all evidence that moving forward is a death wish, he goes to meet his fate.
Saweetie, too, gave us a grave warning.
A chance to turn back, to save ourselves, and to not go down a ruinous path.
#TheSaweetieMeal x @mcdonalds coming soon.
WHOS READY FOR ONE OF MY INFAMOUS CONCOCTIONS ?
She even called it an infamous concoction, like a fairytale witch.
One of nouvelle cuisines most divisive gastronomes would soon have thousands upon thousands of kitchens operating as her laboratory.
This wouldnt be a matter of food reporting, but one of public safety.
Shes been known to takeginger shotsfor probiotic health.
I chose her strangest-seeming combos; no indulgent crab-leg mukbangs for me.
LikeThe Green Knight,this would be a saga of man facing his own mortality.
Tuesday: Ranchghetti
Yall put ranch in your spaghetti?
Drew Barrymore bravely tried it on her talk show and actually thought it was good.
Having tasted it and, worse, smelled it, I take it all back.
All blended together, the result was more Russian dressing gone bad than vodka sauce.
This one sparked an actual gag reflex.
Lets say an oaky chard?
Thursday: Ramen oysters
Saweetie eating hot Cheetos on Pizza…Ramen noodle seasoning on oysters??
But I screwed up here.
Was the combo delicious on an oyster?
Yes, like something youd get on a nice Asian-fusion tasting menu.
Was it true to Saweetie?
Then she strains the noodles dry.
And lastly, she dumps them in a bag of Flamin Hot Cheetos.
Nobody showed me this, but Im telling you.
Dont tell nobody, she says, imparting a forbidden wisdom as she pulls out a neon-red bite.
This was one of the better drunk foods Ive ever had, even though I was dead sober.
This is something Ill crave when Im pregnant, she said.
We polished it off in front ofThe White Lotus,and I had heartburn all night.
(Buyer beware: hey enjoy Saweetie concoctions responsibly and have Tums on hand.
In fact, a little packet of Tums should come with every Saweetie Meal.)
It was Saweetie Meals Eve.
Could her McDonalds offering top this high?
She dresses hers with fries on the inside and sweet-and-sour sauce in a puddle over the bun.
But I had been eating like Saweetie for a week.
I wanted to kick things intoFast Motion.
Id share with my roommates, but not before I did some concocting of my own.
A vision unfurled before me.This is my design.
This was weirdly good and extremely fine, like a coleslaw, if not a bit too sweet.
Burger bits and a barbecue sauce gravy rounded it out.
This dish emphasized how inconsequential the actual beef patties are to McDonalds, despite its whole thing being burgers.
The crunch of the nugs between the soft buns was a super-fun fast-food texture and flavor experience.
Could have done without that other patty.
But that was an hour ago, and now my stomach hurts and I have a headache.
I feel like a blogger whos been eating shit all week.
These collabs have been a hit for McDonalds, and I fear what comes next.
How would I survive that?
I got that summertime, summertime Big Mac!
Welcome to mcdonalds would you like to try the lana del rey mealpic.twitter.com/kcRT4EWo6P
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
welcome to mcdonalds, could we interest you in the kendrick lamar meal?
can i interest you in the Doja Cat meal ?pic.twitter.com/mdoAI1Ah2K
welcome to mcdonalds you ungrateful little pig.
Saweetie would approve of that, too.
