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Werner Herzog is driving a car, with a nameless cameraman filming him from the passenger seat.
How many languages do you speak, Werner?
The rest:
Spanish, English, German.
And then I spoke modern Greek better than English.
Once I made a film in modern Greek.
But thats because in school I learned Latin and ancient Greek.
So from ancient Greek to modern Greek, its not that far.
And I do speak some Italian, and I do understand French, but I refuse to speak it.
Its the last thing I would ever do.
It actually happened to me.
I was taken prisoner in Africa.
One pointing a gun here, a Kalashnikov.
Another one here, and another one there.
So that was very unpleasant because they were all drunk, and some of the little ones were stoned.
Here we are speaking French.
So I had to say a few things in French.
I shouldnt have done it.
These 200-plus words capture the strange allure of Werner Herzog.
He has the mien of someone for whom speaking innumerable languages is possible.
Real clips of real Herzog are even more popular.
Which seems like it may have caught up in our culture right now.
I tried to channel the worst impression you might have of someone like me.
I decided,What if I was more like them wouldnt that be more interesting?
One of my goals was to make a movie where you were constantly asking yourself,Is this real?
If it isnt real, why?
Why would they do this?
It was just a subject that was always interesting to me.
Its also a subject close to my heart, for I, too, am a faker.
I rejoiced in the credulity of others only to feel the sting of comeuppance not long after.
(Not even Roger Ebertdefinitivelycalled the film a mockumentary in his review.)
I mean, clearly, you’ve got the option to see that I directed the movie.
So of course I couldnt possibly be that stupid to make a movie that made me look so bad!
Theyd ask angry questions, and Id have to be like, Guys, that didnt happen.
My friend Michael is still alive, and Werner is not really angry.
I was pretty happy with that, that it confused some very smart people.
I tell Penn that these are exactly the sort of things I could imagine Herzog having in his home.
That stuff is real!
But the house isnt real.
Its actually my house.
I picked up all his stuff.
I said, Bring the spears, bring this, and we used it as set design.
I had a whole list of true stories hed told us beforehand.
I mean, Ive heard him speak those languages.
His attitude toward French is what he says.
I didnt make that up, he replies.
Youd have to ask Werner.
Can you hear me?
asks a black screen on my laptop.
Hes actually a pretty down-to-earth guy, Penn coaches me ahead of the call.
I had Werner and Lena Herzogs wife over the week before last, and we made ribs.
Theyre six feet long and shot like javelins by natives in the rainforest in Amazonia.
So Zak liked it, and I brought it as a prop.
According to Herzog, the overall film came together in a similarly effortless way.
Penn sent him a screenplay and asked if he would play a part, and Herzog said yes.
I had the feeling that a little bit of self-irony would be good for me.
And you will know it in five minutes flat when you watch the film.
This wasnt the case for some of those early audience members, I counter.
It only shows the borderline where stupidity begins, Herzog says.
You see these reviewers who would lambaste Zak they are simply stupid, that is it.
Its a simple borderline that shows you that no culture of film reviews anymore.
All has shifted into celebrity news.
Feeling increasingly stupid myself,I bite the bullet.
No, he says.
Look, I do speak those languages, sure.
Its of minor importance; as always, theres some layers, few facts, a few distortions.
Discourse is different from French.
I did have to do with child soldiers in Honduras and Nicaragua for one film.
Only those who are deeply religious would tell you what the truth is, he says at one point.
And they are obviously as wrong as it gets because the biggest of all fake news is religion.
And what of this outtake, I ask.
I always quote Michelangelo as my key witness he replies, whosePietais in Rome.
When you look at the statue, you see the dead body of Jesus in Marys lap.
Jesus face is the tormented face of a 33-year-old man.
And when you look at the face of his mother, she is 15.
So my question is, Did Michelangelo venture to cheat us?
Did he have a go at give us fake news?
Did he have a go at defraud us, lie to us?
I think he made a clear statement.
Seamas OReillys childhood memoir,Did Ye Hear Mammy Died?
