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This interview has been edited and condensed.
It contains numerousStation Elevenspoilers, particularly about Goodbye My Damaged Home, the seventh episode.
When Mackenzie Davis and Matilda Lawler get on our Zoom call, they look accidentally the same.
Side by side on the screen, they look like they could be related.
Its a very emotional episode in an already emotional series.
Mackenzie Davis:Not at all.
I mean, Matilda kind of originated the character, which also feels right to me.
I dont think youre one person in your entire life.
I really got to know her through the dailies and watching her work from afar.
Matilda Lawler:I think the first time we met was actually at the camera test.
Within the first few minutes, we started playing the mirror game.
You know that game?
:It was weird.
We just started doing that.
And we were actually pretty good at it, I must say.
How much were you able to shoot before you had to pause things?
:We filmed episode one and three, I think, withHiro Murai.
Then everything shut down, and we filmed the rest in Toronto.
:I think it enhanced it a bit.
:It definitely amplified the connection to the material, to put it lightly.
In the end, anything specific felt kind of meaningless, especially since our show was about the aftermath.
These things felt so distant and far away but also like they were still ongoing.
The show really captured that feeling.
Then, Matilda, you start singing The First Noel.
Its kind of like a mechanism.
In that moment, we were all feeling so much; the worlds ending on TV.
Mackenzie, in that scene, as adult Kirsten, youre crying.
I was thinking about what your character would be thinking about
M.D.
:I feel so bad.
I thought that was the saddest sort of thing I could see.
She really needed to be taken care of in that moment.
:Your pronunciation was correct.
I fought very hard for it to beKer-sten.
:Well, I think itsKer-sten, but by the time I showed up, it was alreadyKeer-sten.
Its an in-joke with us, of me constantly yelling about them for calling herKeer-sten.
:For the read-through of the very first episode, I was saying I wasKer-sten.
:Because thats how its spelled.
:And then Himesh picked up on that, too.
But then Patrick was like, Keer-sten.
And Im going to use any PR opportunity to bring it to light.
What do you think was her motivation for wanting to stay?
Is it because she wants to be able to say good-bye to Frank?
:I think its like exposure therapy for her.
She hasnt thought about this in a long time.
Everything shes done in her life has moved forward: create, take care, defend against danger.
I dont think she knows at first shes going to stay there the whole time.
I get the opportunity to sit with myself and talk myself through the trauma.
There is one scene in which youre both standing face to face talking to each other.
Were you able to look at what had just been shot and see that?
Or did you not realize it until later?
Do you not watch yourself because you dont want to mess with your performance?
M.L.:Yeah.
I have trouble watching myself.
Sometimes its helpful if you’re able to see yourself as a different person.
Youre like,Okay, make a run at watch yourself like youre not yourself.
But thats hard for me.
I mean, even right now, I dont know if you realize
M.D.
:I just thought the same thing.
We look so similar.
:I think about that a lot.
There are multiple reasons.
One of them is that it was kind of a good-bye.
Theres this really subtle empath to her that understands the right route to go.
Its based on an extreme sensitivity to a situation and timing.
And it feels like she follows that intuition with Jeevan to come to the house.
Theres a lovely symmetry there, I think.
At the end of the play, the intruder comes in and stabs Frank.
Mackenzie, youre there, and youre observing the stabbing.
Did you give a shot to play that a few different ways?
:I dont remember.
In terms of playing it, I always forget that stuff.
But then that obviously becomes too much to handle in the end.
It was a really intense thing to visualize and experience, the whole apartment scene.
I think there were moments where I was grasping at more stoicism.
M.D.:Yeah.
I cant say enough about how thats not my party trick or skill set.
I understand when its necessary, but generally, Im like,Tears arent important.
Dont focus on the material output; focus on how you feel in a thing.
It hit me all the time with the same potency, which has not happened to me before.
:Yeah, but I also had it beforehand.
I mean, it definitely got more acute.
Its so funny how much Shakespeare meta text there is in the play within the play.
It felt like we were in the pandemic, playacting our pandemic.
I would yell at Patrick because I wasnt like, This is so cool!
Im crying all the time.
I was like, What sorcery have you put into this text?
Why am I crying all the time?
Theyre talking about spending time with people they love or saying good-bye.
Is viewer reception something you think about?
:We didnt know if this was a good time for the show to come out.
The great shock of my life is that everybodys digging into this pandemic show during our current era.
Im so happy that people are.
What do you think, Matilda?
:I feel like it gave me a feeling of closure.
I was worried that people were going to be like,I dont want to watch this.
This is bringing up traumatic memories for me.
:It feels like the wayContagionwas quite comforting in the early days of the pandemic.
Any kind of story is helpful in a crisis.
And you created one for everybody else.
Because not knowing the end is the thing thats most distressing.
