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A quick heads-up: Later in this conversation, theres discussion about bulimia and anxiety resulting from food disorders.
Youve been promo-ing this album for almost a year now, ever since you released How Long for theEuphoriasoundtrack.
Does release week feel extra intense for you?[Laughs.]
Yeah, its been pretty intense.
Everything is full speed ahead.
Ive really enjoyed it.
Its been fun going around the world and being on tour again.
Its so funny; you could tell that no ones used to it.
Theres that fear of COVID looming, but I feel like Id forgotten that it was this intense.
Do you think the audiences behavior has changed?
This guy threw it and really aimed at me.
But this thing hit really close to my eye and jolted me, took me out of the moment.
Imagine if someone threw an ice cube at you on the street youd be like,What the fuck?
!Just dont throw shit at artists, thats No.
In that video, you asked your viewers how you should have reacted.
And on TikTok, its the place to be stripped of anything artist.
Are you finding that more people arepronouncing your name correctlynow?Yeah, and people are apologizing.
But honestly, its not their fault; I adopted the international way of saying it.
In my private life, people would say Too-veh.
It felt like a good line.
Like, okay, when Im working, Im Tove and when its me at home, its Too-veh.
Its really interesting seeing it change.
One trailer ofRuPaulsaying Too-veh-loo and its like,Oh my God!
We all fucked up!
Theres often a lot of emotional intensity in your songs.
Theres only space for one!
A lot of the time, people end up feeling responsible because I have an intense energy.
People get affected by it, my breakdowns.
So your music became the space for those breakdowns?Yeah, definitely.
Its a place where I dont have to modify my feelings.
I cant always just launch at everyone with my feelings.
In my music I can.
There wasnt any other place to do that.
I do it a lot when its a returning feeling too.
Its what connects me the most with my fans.
Im always happy to not censor that part.
He definitely has his fucking weird quirks, just like me, but I feel really loved and respected.
Even if were in a fight, I still feel like hes being good to me.
Its very new and weird.
I have a lot of material to grab from.
Then I write a song about it because I cant let the scenario go out of my mind.
But whenever theres intense love, theres always going to be intense fear or irrational worries.
They were like,This is so provocative, you dont understand.But that was my point.
Why am I supposed to want this if I dont know that I do?
You cant tell me that every single second since youve been pregnant has been blissful.
It doesnt mean that I want babies or maybe I do.
Thats where I end up all the time.
How has this rollout been for you as a newly independent artist?Its a lot more work.
I have to decide the plan.
But I have full creative control without having to fight for it.
Its kind of scary to trust my gut on everything, I feel very free but also very overwhelmed.
Had you fulfilled your previous contract?Yep, it was all done.
Id met wth some major labels after.
I feel like everythings changed so much in the last three years since I put out my last album.
I will say, though, that Id never have gotten the platform I have without a major label.
Id never have been able to break out in America as a Swedish artist.
Im also not really a business person, its not where my passion lies.
As an artist, you now have to want to do it all.
I also dont really know why I wrote this song now.
Maybe it was the stillness of the pandemic.
I feel that might not be the case for everyone.
Its a very long process that you have to stay so strong through.
Its a disease where you feel a lot of shame, a lot of failure, mountains of self-hatred.
Its a constant issue.
I was so focused on that.
That makes me sad sometimes.
I looked for proof in my environment that nobody thought I was good enough.
You will find that if you are looking for that.
You collect those small criticisms.
Then food became the one thing I could control, even though I couldnt.
I had pretty severe bulimia.
I hated myself even more.
Its a vicious cycle that ruins your body.
That was kind of my wake-up call.
I went to a voice doctor after maybe five years of it.
The doctor felt my vocal cords and said, I can tell youre bulimic.
So I was like,What am I doing?This is the one thing that makes me happy.
I think that probably took another five years and then I was good.
Does that feel like the end point to your eating disorder?Yes.
Well, that was down to all the work I did.
Its also just become such a fun part of the show.
Half of the crowd are basically flashing me back and its this hilarious moment.
It makes me feel really powerful, too.
