RuPauls Drag Race
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A double elimination on season 14?
Finally, were cooking with gas.
Two at a time!
Get these bitches out of here!!
We have our top five, and were one elimination away from our final four.
(Ill leave heavy-handed references to the Oscars roast to other recappers.)
Well, the race may not be over yet, but the final sprint is around the corner.
So without further ado, my final five rankings:
1.
Willow Pill
Setting aside the hiccup that wasSnatch Game, Willow has barely faltered in this competition.
Willows roast extends far beyond her set, however.
But the thing about shit-talking is that youve gotta earn it, and Willow has.
The judges are always saying Jorgeous was born for drag.
All that will be left is the worlds tiniest sequin bra.
So, where does this leave Willow?
But in recent seasons, winners seem to be more based on vibes than on track record arithmetic.
And if theres one thing Willows got in spades, its impeccable vibes.
A fan favorite slash weirdo who minds her business on the show and off?
Bosco
Bosco is back, baby!
Its been a rough month for Bosconsters such as myself.
But in a true return to form this week, Bosco does what she does best: write jokes.
So it should come as no surprise when she opens up the roast and kills it.
Rotted, ageist, and clever as hell.
Her spot in the top four seems like a given, but can she take it all the way?
Shes claimed two wins total and received rave reviews for the rest of her run.
On the runway, shes peak Camden in a beautifully appointed ballerina costume, with matching face stoning.
Theres no doubt that the judges love her: theyre lavishing her with great critiques week after week.
Its a nebulous criteria, to be sure, but a crucial one.
Angeria Paris VanMichaels
Rounding out my guess for the final four queens is Americas Sweetheart, Angeria Paris VanMichaels.
Its giving Miss Congeniality.
And the judges seem to feel the same way.
Even though they werent that funny!
And laugh they did!
It seems harsh, but theres some merit to it.
On the runway, this might be my favorite Angeria runway yet.
She steps out in a beautiful pageant gown layered with tulle in all the right places.
Its both totally on theme and completely original.
So why isnt Angeria higher in my top five power rankings?
Daya struggles hard in the roast this week.
Nothing she says has any bite, and the setups are drawn-out and pointless.
With her muse (Jasmine Kennedie) gone, Daya is simply out of rude things to say.
Could Daya sneak into the top four in place of, say, Angeria or Lady Camden?
I suppose its possible.
But even if that were to occur, claiming the win seems almost impossible.
But fret not, Daya!
Im sure thats somehow Jasmines fault.
N/A Jorgeous
The queen who was born for drag has officially lipped her last sync.
Jorgeous can out-perform Daya Betty in many genres, but Gen Z pop-punk is not one of them.
But what a performance to go out on.
To watch RuPaul not just enjoy Jorgeous, but be theonly onewho enjoys Jorgeous in the moment is mesmerizing.
My guess is between four and ten.
Jorgeous is sad to go home but not nearly as sad as RuPaul.
Pour one out for him tonight, girls.
N/A Deja Skye
You had a good go at it.
Thanks for your input.
