The Bachelor
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But for the first two weeks, youll have to make do with me.
Well all muddle through somehow.
The first thing to say right off the bat is that Clayton wants kids!
He wants kids very badly.
In general, the game is the game.
Doors are going to get knocked on.
Fences will be jumped.
But showing up before limo night is a bridge too far!
(Good work to the props team, though.
That rose was as readily available as a free AOL CD-ROM in the year 1998.)
Its a bold move.
And yet Im also proud of her?
Lets take a moment to talk about Jesse!
That seems like about the most you could ask of him.
Will Teddis virginity become a major plot point?
We all can say.)
My theory is that this is how his awkward midwestern-ness is manifesting.
Hes concealing his feelings; hes trying to go with the flow.
But somewhere inside him, he also finds most of this kissing to be pretty suspicious.
Is his future wife someone who will be this forthright with the mouth hockey this early?
So these are Midwest Nice kisses.
And Claire, wildly overdramatic though she is, picks up on this!
Clayton has her sent home, no surprise.
But what a strange beginning for this dude.
Theres a lid for every pot.
Kind of an interesting move,Bachelor.
Clayton is appealing to Teddi, apparently, and she isveryappealing to him.
She gets the first-impression rose, and every single person watching says, Yep!
Okay, now for the goods: the preview!
Clayton walks on a tundra.
And then theres the already infamous Im in love with each of you.
Clayton will tell three women (presumably the final three??)
And it doesnt include Teddi!
This is a practical and important reminder to us all.
If youre going to cry on TV, take the napkin out of the damn ring!
Dont just sit there wielding it like an oddly floppy spear make use of all that napkin real estate.
