The Real Housewives: Ultimate Girls Trip
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How do you solve a problem like Dorinda?
How do you extract the bourbon from a bung?
How do you solve a problem like Dorinnnnn-Daaaaaa?
How do you hold a temper in your hand?
The screaming, the blow-ups, the meanness.
Tamra says she gets it, but Dorinda forces her to read the plaque with the rules.
It almost seems like Tamra got off easy (no one gets off easier than Brandi hey yo!
Well, why is she screaming about it and cant let it go if its no big deal?
This is why we dont wear costumes!
I dont know if that is necessarily true.
But I also think this is just who Dorinda is.
You cant blame that on the booze or the bossa nova.
Um, she is the queen of Mount Molehill.
That night there is a Prohibition Dinner, which is just a Roaring 20s party in disguise.
At least she claims her house used to be a speakeasy, so that makes a little more sense.
Its at this dinner we learn that a bunghole is a hole in a barrel.
Ds business partner puts something long and hard into that bunghole.
He puts it in over and over again.
He shoves it in deep.
He shoves it in hard, and eventually, liquid comes out.
Oh, its not what youre thinking.
She couldnt get a man?
DidRidickuloushave a previous booking?
The party then divides between those who want to get naked and those who dont.
But isnt this a hostile work environment?
Isnt this what Me Too was all about?
In the living room, Dorinda is getting ready for her final blow-up of the night.
This one is at Jill Zarin.
Eva tries to let her down gently, but Jill does not like to take no for an answer.
She likes to be let down hard.
She likes to be a baby dropped on its soft spot from the second floor.
When Dorinda tells her to stop asking, shes actually right.
But its after Jill gets teary about Dorinda upstairs in the confessional room that Dorinda gets mean.
This is where youre weak, she says to Jill as she walks away.
This is the real drunk nastiness.
This is the cause of the pause.
This is what is turning me away from Bluestone Manor.
Did you know theyre cashmere?
She got them on special at TJ Maxx.
Can you believe it?
Jill closed the door to her room and threw her makeup bag on her messy bed.
She dug through for the bottle of emergency pills she keeps in there.
It rattled in her shaking hands as she futzed with the childproof cap.
She shook out one light blue diamond, the Xanax that would send her off into sleep.
When Jill finally stopped moving with a jerk, the woman let her lifeless body fall to the ground.
It didnt even make a thud.
