The Serpent Queen
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I think were all tired of the But was shereallya villain?
question of the last 20 years and are ready for someone who just owns their terribleness.
So lets get into it!
But were getting ahead of ourselves.
Catherines best quality is her practicality.
The year is 1560 and everyone is terrified of Catherine because they think shes a witch.
Especially because she was close with Nostradamus (theNostradamus) and also maybe poisoned a bunch of people.
Its one of the weirder stereotypes but definitely not the weirdest.
Rahima is pretty sure praying for their souls will work out.
Catherines parents are wealthy but die tragically (syphilis and suicide).
And then killing dogs in retaliation!
She kills the dog!!
(But it really seems like she did.)
But then who comes to ransom her but the pope.
Not even his emissary!
Its just the pope himself.
I should mention the pope is her uncle (can you imagine?)
and he has plans.
Since shes a woman, these plans consist entirely of marrying Catherine off to someone.
For now, hes telling Catherine shes not much to look at, so she spits in his wine.
Shes got gumption, that one.
And good news, theres a distant cousin of her mothers at the French court Diane de Poitiers.
Catherine gets a makeover like were in a 1998 teen film (hurray!
), and Catherine tells them all she needs to befancierto impress the French court.
Catherine also gets to choose herentourage.
I guess hers is aretinue,but were calling it an entourage.
1 is Angelica, a perfumer who definitely knows how to poison people.
When the pope laughs, she adds that people are idiots.
Catherine also hires a fortune teller, who I assume is Nostradamus, and off we go to France.
But if you play your cards right, you could be a princess in that shithole.
Does she trip getting out of the egg?
Yes, she does.
Francis accepts and Catherine meets Henri, who is very cute and charming.
She falls in love with him immediately, which is really unfortunate, but here we are.
Whats up?you might ask.
Yes, shes about 20 years older than Henry (who is 14!
Historically, at least.
Catherine feels betrayed, because obviously, and decides never to trust anyone again.
In her chambers, Catherine sees the missing orange and smiles.
But for women, its like,hey, surprise; we planned your marriage.Boooooooooo.
They all laugh at the stupid French for not knowing what a fork is.
Mathilde is played by Kiruna Stamell, who isvery good at tap dancing!
I love when people are good at one thing (like acting!
), and you find out they have another skill set theyve honed for years.
