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Im here to stand up for our celebrity brethren and defend their right to be a little bit crusty.
First, I think its important to note that I am riddled with personal biases.
Does this lead to me being gross?
I guess my deal is mostly like: Some days I dont shower … and thats okay.
no matter your activity level or sweat amount?
That is a fear-based response, which I believe is mostly drilled into us by going to middle school.
The most obvious target in school has always been The Stinky Kid.
But I dont believe this is the celebrity hit piece we think it is.
These smell stories seem to fall under this third category, which has evolved over the decades.
But with this new iteration of celebrity-revenge story, weve upped our game.
This isnt stars are just like us; this is stars are actually less good than us.
Because what is more luxurious than letting go of middle-school trauma?
To not shower is to be luxurious, and us Normals remain desperately unable to afford it.
A weirder element of this trends success needs to be addressed, and thats the greatunshowered conspiracy.
And dont get me wrong, this is fun.
Finally, a conspiracy theory for people who love celebrity gossip.
Its a little bit bitchy but still makes you feel smart!
And the best part is, its just for us girls.
Because one celebrity not showering is a laugh, butfourcelebrities not showering is a psyop.
It asks, Why would celebritieswillinglyadmit this?
So yes, I get why its funny that celebrities dont shower.
Thinking about Kristen Bell having little stink lines and cartoon flies around her is truly an lol for me.
And it does dry out my skin!
Showers should be for a reason.
So free yourself, be like your favorite celebs, and rise up, Stink Nation.
