Winter House
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In Andy Cohens name, we pray.
That is not news.
That is some dog bites man bullshit.
Bitches, this is the main course.
If you finish it all, youll get to share Korys string of pearls for your dinner.
Finally, when everyone sits down, Ciara asks them what they shouldnt talk about at dinner.
I mean, this could go on all night.
You may get guys more slowly, but they stick around.
Shes saying that, yes, she may be hot, but she cant keep a man.
We see this in action.
Contrast that with Jess and Kory.
They go around the table on the last night talking about their favorite moments.
Jess says it was getting to know Kory.
Kory is like, Skiing was fucking rad, man.
and not one mention of the woman whose bed sheets he has been sullying.
Anyway, I see how Rachel took Jesss comment the wrong way.
I can see how that is triggering.
I dont know how this fight dissolved so suddenly, but now everyone is screaming.
Jess pulls Kory inside and says she doesnt know why no one likes her.
Rachel fits in, but Im the ugly duckling.
Bitch, Im the hottest one here, she says.
Get a clue, Jess.
Not that last part, but I know it to be true.
No one wants to be exclusive with you.
Kyle and Amanda win the best costume for dressing as an old couple like Johnny Knoxville in theJackassmovies.
Austen decides that he wants to clear things up with Ciara.
Ugh, this is why Austen is the worst kind of man.
Hes a dude who treated her like crap for a year.
I mean, Austens litany of crimes against this woman is long.
If he wanted to be friends, he should treat her like his friend.
Luckily, she basically tells him that shes through with him.
She doesnt want a relationship; she doesnt want a friendship; she wants to be done with him.
Again, this is why Austen is the worst.
Hes going to be like, I tried to be friends, man.
I did everything right.
She cut me off.
Hes going to have a go at come out looking like a saint.
This dude is on reality TV.
Weve seen it all.
Weve seen you be such an asshole even proctologists dont want to look at him.
(She didnt really, but she did spiritually.)
And everyone filters out.
The snow out back is melting.
The trees on the mountain are starting to bud, beginning their cycle of life for another year.
